War with myself

I've prayed upon the weary hour
And still my mind preys on me
In darkness when even the Lord would sleep
I'm fated to entreat the devil.

He comes as any demonic presence
Clothed in the raiment of lust
And in his kingdom of darkness he reins
To dirty my soul like rust

And clothed in blood I beseech my god
To rid me of sinful thoughts
And all my life's transgressions soil me
I lay me down like dust to dust.

Forgive o Lord my folly and wickedness
that I might yet be free
Stop this burning in my chest
And put out the fires that ignite me.

O God of Abraham and Isaac who begat
And begat and begat and begat
Free me from the tools of that
So I might live to serve in abstention

You've done it a few times but I lack retention
I want to win big and not be an honorable mention.

The savage awakens

The beast in me arises with the moon:
That ravenous, aching, unforgiving tune
That sings within me to be within you-
As I become we and split open you.

And feral hunger drives me in deeper
Like a creeping vine binding us
I consume your soul like the reaper
And eat your lust with foul unrepentant savagery.

Life is given to the living and yet I,
Consume with all viciousness like a dead man in hell
Thrusting and grinding all skin till it's red
Into the innocent, milk white bed-

O the vile and wild full throbbing desecration
Mixed in with such negligent, savage elation
Higher life forms should never so vehemently indulge
And yet as the moon unfolds-
Perhaps the tides-
Perhaps barometric pressure-
Perhaps simple animal nature tucked away in the human psyche
No longer able to be repressed
I collapse in an infinite reverberating mess
With you at my side
And you know the rest.

The dogs of war have fated warriors fight
Those who don't are doomed to repeat this night.

Adulthood

Sometimes the rays of sunshine fade
When the day turns to dusk too early
And those who once had found their way
Wander aimlessly in a seasonally changed place.

Impermanence and cold is winter
And sometimes mute in the evening's glow
Oh how I long for the dead time when-
I walked home under yellow Street lamps in snow.

There were days when a journey had two points
And there was yet somewhere else to go
Yet here I stand waiting, telling jokes to quell the din
And waiting another day to know-

All good fun comes to an end
And even in the mind adventure eventually dies.

The Wind in the Pirate sails.

I've lost good friends and much of my crew-
and yet the boat sails on;
Though I stand: leader of few-
does not mean that I am done.

and hear, my friends, the call to duty that all good hearts adhere
some call it our job, some call it god-
but all the good souls fear;
yes all the good souls listen my friends-
when a higher purpose draws near.

Hunting in Blue

The sound of the slide milking its fang
The sweat on your palms as you meander.
The target's beyond some door but you'll never know where
And the night is like a muted recording studio with the lights out.

From a distance, reality breathes
and you hear the bark of some angry highway dog
On a highway with hundreds of angry metal hounds
Then the other snake attacks and stings your shoulder.

It's wet like rain but in a split second, you react with no pain.
Lightning screams in the night from the extension of your forearm and in an instant a father's dead.
A brother silenced from anger and fearlessness in the struggle for living well.

Foot soldiers all go to hell but you'll be carried off by the Valkyrie.
Backup will arrive too late but wait, there's a light,
Or that's what you'll tell them if they get there to save your life
soon! And you drift off to sleep in a recording studio with no mics or lights.

The Mariner's last lament

On the island Goshevin, in the sea of Nog-
I kept him well my ancient friend and told him to live on;
But lo death's shadow came to him as it claims us all-
And I alone am left to fend the darkness that befalls.

The emptiness where bonds have been is like the falcon's path-
Where one can gather up their strength and soar upon the Mass;
But on the service close, the weeks give way to the end of the dream-
All mourners will dive towards the earth: reality's gravity screams!

So there upon the rock I sat afar from all my means-
To keep this man who must be kept and unravel at my seams;
As if my life were finely woven and he was but a thread-
I held hard to the thread and lost the cloak upon his death.

But I a man of doubt should still have left a boat upon the shore-
For here I sit alone and have for ages ever more.
The lesson's this to you who finds this note I set adrift-
Hold hard your mind in love and loss or strand your self like this.

1

Puzzle pieces scattered wide across the hard wood floor.
Over time they've come together save the spot for one more-
and when I found it, I declare, I haven't been the same
Sleep is nearly impossible when you are on my brain.

I found heaven when I found you
and all else is like standing in the rain.

Orgasm

Forget about the things you know
Be bold for tomorrow
Is not guaranteed.
Love and get lost within the throws
Of a moment in which you are freed.

Learn to love it.

Just when constant torment breaks-
Your mind bent weary full of ache-
Your heart innately follows suit-
No dream of ever seeing soothe-

The world will give you happy things-
Or bid you well on sharp Swift drink-
And find you well the sweet release
Of faith embedded or long time sleep.

A nap to quell the fettered mind
As dreams will loosen and clear the bind
And there will be the open door
Through past torment you've been through it many times before.

And dad will tell you, "this too shall pass"
And friends will say, "no ailments last."
So think until your death arrives
You're going to wake to tomorrow's fight.

And weary though it makes you now
Tomorrow brings another row
So sleep emboldened that life never quits
You live, you fight, you take more shit.

But all in all, life never quits
Yes, all in all, learn to love the bullshit.

Living is a gift

Keep god in your heart,
hold love in your life,
don't fear other people,
you're not always right.
Forgive when you can, stand up to the man
and love everybody: treat all as your family.

A million faces in every day,
the devil works hard but you don't have to sway.
You CAN say when your wrong and help carry on:
for those who don't know and those who need you to be strong.
Remember we're all people, we've all got our flaws;
Sometimes you might find it hard to go on.

I've seen a president break down in tears
And 10 years given to a man without any peers.
A lesson that we all have to learn is stay honest:
because there are people out there who will kill you for just trying
to live a life out in the open disagreeing with policies that happen to be broken;
but think of this while your choking on Hollywood smoke:
you can make a difference or complain about being broke.

There's always a worse path that any of us could have taken
but people: none breathing out there are forsaken...

When he's gone

There's silence when the baby leaves the car:
His "ooo"-ING and "oh"-ING
And laughing and " I know"-ING
Leave deafening silence when he's gone.

And then reality hits so hard:
The day begins to take shape.
Work becomes a real possibility
Fun freedom is left at the door-

To his daycare where he will go on to spread joy-
I see the blue eyes sparkling in my baby boy.
As he sits down to talk with his friends:
Friends! He connects and interacts,
The evolution of his life never ends-

How he imagines and plays and it seems just yesterday-
That I held him in my arms-
And he looked up at me-
With tiny, alien black eyes like night
And I had the first day,
The best day,
For the rest of my life.

Moral Boosting Leadership

A tale told all too well can swell
Amidst the mind of naïve folks
How to tell poet from bull-shitter-
Entertaining with truisms and fallacy in full glitter!

As if to end the day with lies could heal a wounded soul-
But wit becomes such vibrancy in sarcastic levity-
To mock the truth: acknowledgement is bold!
Favor truth in all you do as lies are long and truth's in brevity.

The spiral to destruction

A ship sets sail on the open ocean with 500 at its helm.
But wind and wave and sea born beast leave 300 to set the sails.

300 is too small to sail a large sea faring ship-
so 100 in three long boats go forth to brave the wisps.

Wouldn't you know that the sea is an ugly mistress
So 100 in just one boat end up the advent-tourists.

When land is far from you and sickness kills at sea,
Then 50 became that crew of 500's company.

And yet as the adventure waned, no land did these men see-
So after many months along, there were but 1, 2, 3!

And 3 men could not brave the whale, their boat was split in two!
Said one man to the other, this raft is too small for me and you.

And driftwood rafts with one man aboard
Cannot the open ocean bear-
If ship to feed or ship to join does not come soon I fear,
There won't be any of the 500 to sail again, anywhere.

The lesson's this for crews avast:
Be careful of your shipman's number
For those who dwindle will not last
Expand or die to feed the hunger.

Make note of this my Shipman friends
For I predict this now:
If you have listened then now you watch
The fate of the 500 from your bow
Whatever ship you sail on now...

Resume

I need my friends now 'cuz I've fallen in a dark hole-
Already lost myself, I feel empty like I lost my soul
Some shit went down and I feel like life is over
And I'm all alone with no friend's shoulder

I'm older than I've ever been and my life is fractured too
I may lose my job, my home and have to start it all again
See, the tip of my shotgun is looking more and more like my last remaining friend...

Battle for humanity

There is scarce the room for good old men
When young men blossom being taught greed
Is the way of the world to achieve your dreams
Even at the expense of your elder kin.

And what of the old philanthropist
Who, jilted, does not research his cause
But so many are in need he gives to this
Or that, provided someone sees him as good.

And when we die, we've only lived once
In hedonism to enjoy the days when
We lived for fun and whatever we want-
There is scarce the room for good old men.

That old familiar feeling

Hello old friend you've come again
In guise of winter darkness.
Your Frosty sheen is cold and mean
And you've saddled me like a cowboy.

In days of snow your magic grew
Despite the cold, I still had youth
And now my older years have come
It seems I'll never see the sun.

I told you once you had no end
And then I gained and lost some friends
In moments I had such great bliss
Then lost it all in moments like this:

The pre-waking hour when I see what's to come
And what has gone and what I've done.