Checking In

I felt like running but I ended up walking
I felt like screaming but I ended up talking
I felt like breathing but you took my breath away
and now I'm stuck to you even when you push me away.

Sometimes my dreams are better than life
when we both live in such unrelenting strife
I want to see day but now I only see night
"We're glowing like the metal on the edge of the knife."



If I sleep, I hope to wake to my dreams
life is much better in the movie scenes...

Stream of consciousness: 12:59 AM MST 5/11/11

oh that fire water there
ran merrily like a sea
deep into the heart of me
Drunk and stupid like a bee.

I drank to joyful Sally
who loved her handsome men
and fuck and fuck till she was sore
but then she'd do it again.

SING! That fire water there
ran merrily like a sea
deep into the heart of me
drunk and stupid like a bumble bee!!!!

Breaking it down

I make a killing off of fantasy/ never asked for clemency/ too much sugar coats make you blind to this cruel world of reality/ I've had many dreams that have ended in tears/ when all I wanted was to live connected for the rest of my years/ a psycho-analyst can syphon sick, sad stories from a brain/ but can they really solve the case: how to end all the pain? Why reconcile with the mild when you can win the game, insane? Like the lame Charlie Sheen brain/ a 16 year old boy needing to be tamed/ tell you what I'm gonna end this on a positive note: No matter who you are, you'll die: you're life's a f*cking joke.

StOC

I break fast rhythms into my soul
blackness affects me while I'm trimmed with gold
a silver lining is not enough I don't give a fuck if you offer protection or proverbial fluff this game is on
we racing wild like triads in the streets of Hong Kong
I'll Karaoke beatcha ass with a country music song.
Japan, underwater in the heat of a dying world
I see the heart is vicious inside of every girl.
I'm going freestyle bitches, silence like fucking Linus
till I got something to say and get lost in the fray-
So many messages and dreams that fly by in a flash
I want to act on every one while the world kicks my ass.
Internal struggle, rubble, and festering trouble
My vicious mind starts eating me and the frames of my eyes turn blind
in time I may get back my vision but it comes with a decision
and I feel I gotta rep for my internal step and no derisions
Feel lost and old so I thought I'd write Giacold
Sometimes it feels like meeting people is like being bought and sold.

My first night with you

What breath I've lost and can't retrieve!
And yet my heart beats, calm, relieved?
Into the windows of my mind's desire-
Be still fool's heart, while I think and retire.

a force to be reckoned with

Take me baby sugar pie-
I want your virus deep inside.
Have me now complete and whole-
my goal? Two minds within one soul.

One vessel for a future life-
no longer walking, tip-toed, the edge of the knife-
A vintage team as mortality goes-
and we meander, hand and hand, into an Autumn snow.

The Moonchild's Lament

Dear Moon,

Bequeath to me a happy tale-
for mine rains to the salted rain's drought.
I've sought to be an interpreter but
interpreting misery leaves few ways out.

My cradle has fallen-
there's no rock-a-byes now-
plodding through the shit storms begs the question how-
there could be so many nights like this one in life?
I suppose there's no end to the Cancerian strife.

Yet through it all, I've remembered love and I swoon
Oh! How I hate the many cycles of this moon child's moons.
I think I'll have a hard time sleeping tonight-
So I'll bask in the turmoil of the pallid moon light.