Wishing You Here

By Jacqueline Tyree

Stuck in a daze that goes on for weeks,
I think of your face and my heart starts to weep.
The warmth of your embrace, I wish always to keep-
But you are called away and I can't fall asleep.

Wishing you would call I lay here in bed-
With nothing but silence coursing through my head.
Nothing seems right when you are away-
The darkness creeps closer. How I wish you could stay.

As soon as you wake I know my mind will be at ease- 
You'll pick up your phone and we'll shoot the breeze.
Your love I will feel through your sweet voice-
This inescapable distance wasn't our choice.

The distance they say will only make us strong-
I believe what they say but to me it feels so wrong.
I love you. I miss you. I wish you were here.
My baby.
My darling.
My soul mate.
My dear.

Full Moon Feelings

The moon is full, my heart is pounding
The devil in me stirs
The animal instinct like drums is sounding
My loins are aching for her.

My love is far away tonight
I'm almost glad for her sake
For I am a demon full of fire
And ready to impale her on my stake.

Oh darling does your body ache
For me to fuck it raw?
Do all your demons, at the moon, awake?
"Oh daddy, yes!" Do you wish to call?

I smell your stink of sex in me
Like some awakening dream
My sword stands ready for your embrace
My ears perk for your screams.

Have you had me on these nights when the moon is full, and your body's my toy?
The way I want to ream you's a fright,
I am your naughty, vicious devil boy.

An angel when we walk the light
But not so when we're alone
I'll be the thief to plunder you
Deep inside you is my home.

Home is when I am with you
And most days I'd be sweet
But tonight, I'd make you my dirty whore
And fuck you till you sleep.

At Attention

I look around the West End room and see the stupid sensations
Daisy Dukes and Yoga pants, leave none to the imagination.
If you wanted some attention to compensate lack of parental jubilation-
hold strong and keep them guessing for repeated standing ovations-
In more than one way decency breeds a better standing ovation.

Coming to be

When I felt the wind blowing I knew there'd be change;
Looking out on parking lots deserted and maimed-
I saw into futures I did not know foretold:
That soon I'd be bathing in your light heart of gold.

We missed our chance of meeting a few times already
But forever is a long time and destiny is steady
As I waited a week and we met at the bar
And I saw in you the answered prayer that I'd wished on a star.

When I wasn't big enough to lift heavy things
I'd dreamed of a soul who'd meld with mine like a spring
Into a river that flowed to our ocean of love
And as wide as it is we infinately explore eachother, my dove.

In sex, in commitment, in raising our future,
I cannot see an end to the adventure we'll lead-
Our wounds of time apart we will learn how to suture
And on love alone we can learn how to feed-
Building our individual partnership with want over need.

"I love you" is the only way to describe how I feel
Because our love is unexplainable
Our love
Is real.

The Long Road Home

When I was little I thought love was romance:
A riverside walk with sweet smells in the air-
two people who knew the world but didn't even care-
two people who only knew that the other was there.

When I got older I thought it was commitment:
A deep devotion to an ideal without question-
suffering while suffering was my predilection-
breaking down life into problem/solution section by section.

Then later a boy scorned thought love was seclusion:
To put forth effort had born sour fruit-
love was just head games and sex, that's the truth!
And it seemed that we were all just shadows abused.

Oh love in my present I cannot determine:
Sometimes I feel romance and sometimes like vermin.
Always I'm committed but I can't always heal my world-
All I know is I live, in the eyes of this beautiful girl-

I sweat to think she might feel the same way as me
I want for her joy so much sometimes I can't breath
I must be aloof to capture her fascination but still
inside my heart there's a welling jubilation-

That I should hide much more because I feel it might bore
her need for something different that she might not abhor.
What winded breaths I have taken feeling Jackie's sensation-
I wish for happiness and for joy but each has limited duration-

Sometimes. I feel like crying and others like dying-
but I digress. Let me get to the point that I've been trying
to say all along which is that love can't be explained.
Like god looked into my soul and had me arraigned.

All of a sudden I saw my world in her eyes
and my child in her womb and I couldn't tell her lies.
Which would have been easier.
God knows to tell the truth she'll see my heart-
And heaven's never known me since lying was my art.

Love for you's a desert, yet it's filled with infinite parts
Characters to play and puzzle pieces to an exploded heart.
separations to my vices and devotion to you.
my piece of the world and that's the best I can construe.

I've told you what my love is and how I came to it's conclusion
and as you see it's still a mystery, like amnesia memories from contusions.
none of it's an illusion, though, I feel the love for you
I'm your special cup of coffee from our own beans that we brew

Before you I was blind and could not count on my senses
I felt the world would harm me and I had up full defenses
I love you though, and in the darkness, I finally can see
that one thing I know for sure: The words, "I love Jacqueline Suzanne Tyree."

Ghost Town

Walking streets I've known before
I see the patterns I've adored
Reliving moments in a ghost town for me
The memories around me I cannot look away, I see!

My heart thinks only of you once here
And pines for you, no longer near
So I might hold you once again
Taste the sweet necter of my lover and friend-

How do I still, burdened, live alone?
When you are my future, you are my home.
An alien to this foreign world
Away from my child and my girl.

Alas I walk still barren and empty
Without that feeling of good and pleanty
You told me this was but a moment in our lives
But I'd give it up to be with you tonight.

Why?

The way your teeth stick out when you smile,
the way your eyes sparkle when you experience joy;
the way I can feel your heart beating from miles away,
the way I care so much to think of your heart every day-
The way I find myself doing things that exhaust me in hopes of making a better life for us as opposed to me or you-
all of this is what I love and why my life is true to you.
When I sleep and wake with the pillow in my arms,
I know I've seen you in my dreams.
Our lives will be a thousand sweaters my knitting queen,
we're currently only making seams.
I once begged God for my life to be perfect
and he gave me you, my wildest dream.