Profession of Love

My darling my dear,

The winds of time could not obscure you from my visage

your bichromal hair like neurons wisping through my brain

your scent on my pillow and everything I own

and like so deep in my pores, it's ingraned.

My darling my dear,

I hear you in my dreams

calling to me from some forgotten corner of my fantasies

your awesome presence like a musical fade out fading in

till the din of you cannot be tamed.

My darling my dear

we have evanesced but you never left my side

my world existed before you for humoring others

and though I still love such things without your laugh

I hold this truth: I am but an echo

of the man I am with you.

Touch of Death

Do you remember touching death?
As he lay in the casket surrounded by flowers,
His face deflated like a burst balloon over coral.

Had those eyes been open
They would have laughed to see me fail at a push up
My flabby belly touching the floor before my nose did-
And yet, I touched death.

His skin was cold and stung my hand like a bee-
Cradling his jaw was painful as my heart felt
And the sting lingered after I broke caress.
Have you ever touched death?

Life is such a beautiful fairy tale full of laughter and stories
Both the wildly hilarious and the boring as he'd sit there with a cancerous dog
And stroke his soft fur with death waiting patiently by
Have you ever touched a waning soul?

And I never would have thought to see him in that chair
When life was with him after the mind had died
And though his life was warm it froze in
The touch where he lay in his Charon's canoe
And the pain that shot up my arm as I caressed his cheek and knew-
That I had touched death.

Where are the rest? Who know this feeling?
There are support groups for the grieving and the bereft
But where are those who can horrifically recall,
That they touched death?

Goodnight grandfather,
may the cold be only the cold of the bomb shell
In the explosion of your life
consuming those who knew you-

So your transcendence would remain in the world in your wake and their's
As those who knew them would grieve at their side
And feel pain but not deny one last touch of a cheek
Confidently touching death.

Waves

I am not one to brave the shore
And yet I cannot account for my stay
So many stable grounds to live on
And yet I love the ocean's sway.

The lack of grip upon my road
Ensures no traveler will sail the same
A wayfarer's lot was mine to gain
And I threw it away for a landlubber.

But there's something to be said for land
For the sea, she can't be tamed.
So I might ride horses over grassy fields
A fair trade for the return of Poseidon's reigns.

Forgive an old salt who's spent too much time away
I wake to rise and shout and quarrel
But where as once eternity was a slew of tomorrow's
I think I've taken to land and enjoy the today's.

When I was a young man, then perhaps
The violence of unpredictability and no shame
But I'm a man now, it's time to give up
The surf of youth and the uncertainty of waves.

Devices

I held her eyes within my soul
Who burned their way into my dreams
And fire erupted when she screamed
What glorious destruction comes in moments like these!

Destruction and construction in the alleyway
With passion and hatred, love and war
Collusion at the sliding door
Where once was reason I don't care anymore.

The night brings hard the iron rod
To beat the flowers to a pulp
The steam flies high like wings above
And leaves her with a dying kiss.

And she will hold the river back,
And ride a chariot of porcelain
While he like Grecians at the walls of Troy
Lays face down like a dying man.

They two would only have the night
To battle their flesh and bleed Jörmungand
And though the fight can't be abhorred
I find I may be feeling Thor
And yet come back for more.

Prayer for the Ostracized...

Dear God

I can't go in your house as your children will rebuke me-
I've fallen so far, my friends seem at a distance
My family's disappointed and my mind is all in shambles
What sanctuary comes to me as I wade through all these brambles
Not that I didn't go into the patch myself
But I have no riches now and I just lost my wealth.

What life is there for wicked men who live with Dibbyuks in them?
No life is there for me who has no sanctuary or dominion-
And so I wake tonight: no sleep or sanctum given.

Dear God I ask you only give me you to get me through this
Where is the man without sin?  You tell me lord, but for christ, who is?

Knowing my mistake

For a moment I see light through the incandescence of a cell phone screen in the dim light of my home
The warmth comes through the speakers like a water buoy flashing on a dark sea.
Time stands still and I sit in purgatory talking through the pain-
Like sitting on a warm subway grate in the freezing rain.

Then you have to go to get something to eat
And it's back to the blind experience in the LSC.
Crawling through a tunnel like one looking for their glasses in a midnight street.
The lamps have not been lit and there's so many demons looking for me.

Ironic I should face demons in this darkness on a Sunday-
The hell is not quite over yet, tomorrow welcomes Monday.
I will have my week to live in silent aberration
Like stepping up a step to find there's still an infinite number of revelations.

To my friend Jess

Every path in life will falter
And 'way leads into way'
Don't spend your time in endless answers
Just question all you say.

For people will find you wise, my friend,
Even if you're the silent idiot
Yet the trick is to be wise regardless
For you're the one who must suffer it-

Or enjoy it because life is a great adventure
Only unwise people love death.
If you can love each day you breath
Relish everything and everyone in it.

These are lessons I learned the hard way; so I thought I'd share with you-
Above all my friend, in everything you do: seek truth.