Smelling Your Pillow

As I lay in the quiet of the twilight house

I leaned into your pillow to smell the absent presence
your perfect beauty a silhouette in my mind
I comforted myself that I am loved.

And to you I cannot disconnect myself
from far or from near you're on my mind
in sing-songy love long words I recount
the many ways you help me unwind.

As I drift off into delirium's drowsiness
I can only think of you
my face down in your pillow
and my dreams reflecting times of us too.

Life Gathering

I await the day with bated breath
to be around the ones who know me
and know that I like them might suffer
with the intensity that makes we writers lonely.

We're of a different breed, we lot
and suffer with the burden of passion
for in a world that lacks the brutality
of complete, unbridled fits of honesty
of loss of control of our apathy
and no longer the choice to ignore our guts
and hearts that bleed pure emotion on a page-
we gather and find some semblance of sanity
amongst the insanity of our company.
Then again, maybe that's just me
But with you, my family, who can feel without regret-
Well there's no place I'd rather be.

With the ones who fill the pages with hearts living,
There's no place I'd rather be.

True Love Letter

Sometimes in the deepest water,
With miles and miles to swim,
we think a life raft makes us weak
and we are better than it.

But while you're drowning, if you would, my dear
allow me to show you I am here.
That I am not just a buoy to hold
but an island away from sorrows that unfold.

While concerning yourself with those who mistreat you,
I entreat you to tell me your greatest woes.
to vomit them from your head like poison
and then forget the unpleasantries you know.

I welcomed the bums and dealers and pained-
the learned, the wicked and scrubs-
I know that you feel you should keep it inside
but I see you drowning and it kills me my love.

Others may love you and may push for an answer
but I swear I love you more than even that-
I love you enough to take on your pain
and that will be that will be that.

I've given you my life, my love and my child
and I exist for your pleasure each day
so give unto me your discomfort and seek
my open heart to guide your way.

For everything you are and can see
I love you, your husband, sincerely, me.

The Silent Torture

I can understand the rage or disillusionment-
I can understand frustration-
I've felt a lot of emotions before
and my goal towards myself and everyone's elation.

Often I find myself in wars I can't fathom-
often I'm flying blind-
with the best of intentions I try to heal the broken
and with a discussion, of any intensity, unwind.

I can take you screaming:
your looks of death and violence,
I'd rather you say nasty things and be done-
One thing I can't take is your silence
as I stand alone with a partner on the run.

Working Pains

Work a day: it's a year in service
routine gives way to lost time.
I focus on repetitive activity
And at the end of the day, a week's gone by.

Servicing the wealthy who take for granted that they're served
make a mess and no one notices in the herd
but when your gone, the burdens fall on we
who know your faces and yes!
We know our places
but our lives success is not assured.

I make this offering and leave it up to your discretion-
This is why, for some of us, Liberty means oppression.

Drive

Depression only lasts so long
in this song of undoing.
But once you've overcome the grief-
with or without support-
When you've grown past the greatness of sad
there's always that comfort and instinctual mad.

You grow with a rage that can bring down redwoods
your fire can melt diamonds-
In these moments, you must forget all distractions
and live in the soul's violence.

Anything that satiates: pot, videogames and liquor-
Toss them in the trash and let progress move quicker
as you hyper focus your rage into success.

This is your fire
your heart
your vengeance
and nothing less.

I Get The Blues

Hello old friend!
I thought I'd not see you again.
I found life, I found love
and a reason to live.

You were gone and yet
now you rear your ugly head-
it's you I dread
the doldrums.

My averageness surprises me
I'm special to no one
live in mediocrity.
I'm worth a lot more dead than alive-

I never wanted this
but I'm part of the hive.
Each day isn't living
it's trying to stay alive.