i vs. i

Sometimes at night when the demons start to gather
I look back at my life and they cover me with their lather
Like the soap of no hope; grungy with its purifying suds
An ooze of cruelty like the thick of black forest mud.
What's worse: it's me! This guilt I cannot placate
These cycling thoughts like dragons circling
the best I can do is to satiate.
What a little man who dwells in my soul
Who summons these visions: bold but cold
To surround him, protected, from sweet release
Of peace of mind, though I'd settle for peace!
Oh little man, "what do you fear?" That holds so strong to all your tears?
Inside of me you have my face allied with demons of petulant haste-
Preventing real progress and freedom and wealth
Could joy be foreign soil and your own private hell?
I've lived entombed in your favorite nightmare
Of familiarity unforgiving while realizing it's not living!
I see you and I know who you are
You're so deep within me I almost weep to give up this far
But I must gain control and end you: soul scar!
My past, my future but never present
You lame excuse for a wreck loose you bore!
You shit piece of garbage; I hate you, you whore!
As I stare in the mirror and hurt for these insults
You are my invincible truth.
Oh! If I could only kill you, what joy for me!
To not stare into your eyes and see my blunders.
To have strength to not fear and overcome the subconscious.
You're my greatest enemy to avoid me because you are me.
You've made my choices and I thought they were right
Until I saw like this at night and you smiled in the mirror as you knew you had the day
When actions should be made and I don't know that I'm afraid
Until it's too late and it's night when this vicious cycle ignites!
So we follow through day to night and end up at now
I would love to defeat you!
Dear god! Tell me how
Adam had a serpent and David his Goliath
But internal insurrection begets a different type of riot
What of my own mind beating me many times
As I end up time and time again with this poison in this whine
I need my plan and instruction for execution for evolution
You, my friend will die in this winning substitution
You are my will and driving force of hate
Focused in this dream of escape
I will take you down the only way I know how
Success will kill you.
Control! I need it and you have it but I can grab it lest I see you forever.

Goodbye my vagabond soul
Soon I'm going to murder you.